What have I done?

Today I had a wilde moment and did something crazy... something I've been puttin' off for YEARS. It's not that I didn't expect to make the commitment in the near future, but what was I thinking? I'm a dabbler, it's what I do, I play with words - and it's serious, but not so when it comes right down to it.

You're wondering what I'm babbling about - I know.. so am I !

Drum roll please..... pthrrrrrrr!

I've been part of a Marine Corps Family Support group since late last year, and this morning I accepted a position with that group to help moderate the myMarine Yahoo! group content. My Marine (son) is currently stationed at Camp Pendleton in California, but I remember what it was like right after he left for boot camp in August of 2006. There was SO MUCH I didn't know about boot camp, the Crops and what to expect that it nearly drove me crazy. (hush you!!)

Being a part of this group has been fun, interesting and a helpful way for me to cope with his pending deployment and to help others as they begin the journey with their recruit as they train and are accepted as Marines. But that wasn't all .. oh no...

... this afternoon, I faxed my application to RWA, yes, this afternoon. You now.. RWA as in Romance Writes of America. Yeah, that organization. I'm excited and terrified at the same time.

Why? Let me count the ways... (and in no particular order)

• First, there's the membership fees. Not that I can't afford it, but I'm sure there is another application for those funds.
• Then, that makes it official. It's like the start of clock - the first official step on the road to be published. YIKE!
• And then, then that means (if only in my mind) that I need to start taking my writing seriously. Which translates (again, in my mind only) to, it's work.

Anyone reading this, rolling their eyes and/or shaking their heads - get over it - it's the way I feel, rational or not, there it is. I'm sure there are others who TOTALLY understand where I'm coming from, and I thank you in advance for your support and words of wisdom.

Then as if all that has gone before was not crazy enough, I marched (ok, clicked) myself over to the GSRWA website, as in Greater Seattle Chapter of Romance Writers of America, and proceeded to submit my application to that group as well.

I know, it's nutzy! My real life jobs, both corporate and domestic, are fucking crazy right now and it's like I've added more nails to my coffin. Well, not so much so, but here's what I'm thinking.

I'm not getting any younger, well ok, that's a given.. but no, not that. I work too much, at work stuff. So IF there are other things besides housework, bills and the four letter W.O.R.K. that I have a responsibility to do then perhaps it will balance out.

And what more responsibility is there than something you've paid money for the privilege to be a part of, really? And I need to make time for my writing, I want to do it, I have voices in my head that sometimes distract me from the W.O.R.K. which is frustrating and counter productive. So what it boils down to is accountability. Being a part of these organizations I hope will level out the effort for the fun work of writing and the W.O.R.K. of earning a living and being part of a family.

That is all the brain dump I have for now... thank you for listening, thank you for your support and thanks for all the fish.